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It takes two…

It takes two…

And on my baby-steps path to being a solo act, I’m starting a duo with my pal Lee. You may know him from such past MusicalSchizo musical experiences as “The Extractors” and “Roman Holiday”, and if you know him from there, you know he’s a drummer and singer.

But if you really knew him, you’d know he’s a guitarist, too! So Lee and I are starting a crazy duo that will have us playing various instruments (he guitar, percussion (cajon, etc), and singing…me guitar, bass, maybe some foot percussion and singing). We will have a relatively atypical but still very pop-oriented song selection (choosing songs people don’t tend to play). And we will bring the acoustic rock.

It should be a lot of fun once we get it off the ground, and I’m going to exploit some of my new contacts to book shows for this group in addition to the shows I’m planning on trying to get for the full Roman Holiday (because it’s been too damn long since that band’s been playing). Maybe since this is 2/3rds of Roman Holiday, we can call it “Tooth Herds” or something punny like that. I guess we’ll see.

GIG ALERT: ATM (Audio Time Machine) is playing on April 23rd and May 14th. So that’s nice. 🙂

And that’s the update. Have a happy St. Patrick’s Day!
TMS

Life Changes Through Life Changes

Life Changes Through Life Changes

So in my last post I talked about being divorced. I know that a lot of great art comes from pain, and I think that some of my best songs arrived via the “pain train”, but there’s also a lot of utter shit that comes from drawing inspiration in something so emotional. I can think back on at least a few songs that were overly sentimental or really heavy-handed dealing with tough emotions. I consider that a problem I have – wielding the pain as more of a sledgehammer rather than a gentle brush. I think the time and perspective that comes from being out of the bad part of the situation (while things are still falling apart) can really work toward expressing something interesting if you’re brave enough to revisit it after the fact with a little perspective.

Of course, I’m nowhere near that phase yet – this is all pretty new and raw. I’m just exploring the concept of making adult friends who might turn into more special friends. Putting myself out there and actually dating for the first time in my life, really…because every relationship I’ve had has been one of convenience – we were in close proximity, we liked each other, things happened…boom – relationship. I’m trying to break this pattern and figure out who the heck I am, because honestly, I have no idea. Removed from being “Heather’s husband”, I’m not really sure who I am. I know that my physical changes (lost 20 lbs, grew about 20 lbs of hair) have garnered a higher level of female attention than I expected, but I’m honestly still in mourning of my life as I lived it for thirteen-plus years.

It’s been a running theme on this blog about me never actually getting my solo acoustic act off the ground, and one thing that has come from the therapy and other things I’ve been through the past few years is the discovery/acceptance that I have serious self-worth issues, mostly because I don’t ever give myself the credit I deserve. Not as a person, producer, performer, musician, or songwriter. Not even as a father sometimes (that one’s improved a lot, even with my departure from the home…I know I’m a good dad, and I do my best to be there for them as much as I can under the circumstances.) I think perhaps the reason the acoustic thing has never happened isn’t just laziness, it’s also a subconscious self-hate campaign my psyche has been playing on me for years – that I shouldn’t book it because why would I subject people to my singing and playing? What makes me think I can entertain people with just my voice and guitar.

Well, I’ve finally accepted that it’s a shitty way to live, bowing down to some imaginary judgment that hasn’t even happened. The fact is, when I’m emotionally clear and healthy, I know I’m a better singer/guitarist/entertainer than most people who do the solo acoustic thing out there. Sadly, I’m just not usually emotionally clear or healthy. As that improves, so will my confidence. But so far that hasn’t really happened, so I’ve decided it’s time to fake it until I make it.

The first faux-confidence display will happen this coming Wednesday, February 12th, when I join my friends Paul and Greg for a gig with our little ragtag trio, “Audio Time Machine” (ATM). I think it’s going to be a really fun show, and I know that I have a bunch of people who have said they are coming to hang out, which is awesome. Friendly audiences are always confidence-boosters. And right now, my sad little brain needs all the help it can get.

But back to the songwriting. It’s weird – it’s been so long since I really wrote a SONG that I’ve almost forgotten how to do it. I’ve been collecting a lot of riffs and musical ideas over the past few years, but nothing seems to every really coalesce into something complete. It’s scatterbrained and seems relatively indicative of how I’ve lived my musical life for the past few years – just taking things as they come with no set plan or organization. This sort of informality can be good to reduce stress levels, but all it does is render everything you do as sort of half-assed. I think that’s why no clear SONGS have come together. And I’m sure that’s part of the reason that in my performing musician life there haven’t been any Roman Holiday gigs since last June. Audio Time Machine is very informal so that takes basically no effort, but we go for long stretches without playing shows. And my sad little brain needs to be playing shows. It’s a really important part of my happiness as a human walking the planet.

So it’s time for me to organize this part of my life a little bit and really make it happen. Get my new solo website together (brianvsings.com) instead of just having it point here (which it does for now). Get my songlist together and start really tightening up my performances of the songs – make them full of feeling, personal, relatable, and very memorable for the audiences. Maybe have some stones and see if I can launch my little act by performing for my day job co-workers in our facility’s live music lounge for happy hour or something. There’s a bunch of built-in fans who like to get drunk after work! (Heck, they like to get drunk AT work sometimes…)

So hold me to it, people. If you see that I haven’t made major moves on this stuff in the next few months, give me crap about it. I deserve it!

Thanks for reading and peace be the journey!
TMS

So I’ve been absent for a long time, and there’s a decent reason…

So I’ve been absent for a long time, and there’s a decent reason…

I got divorced.

Yup. Your faithful servant is now The SINGLE Musical Schizo. No worries, though, it’s very amicable and the ex and I get along splendidly. One of the things that this might actually open up is that I’ll have a little bit more time to focus on musical pursuits, but so far I haven’t really done that. In fact, I haven’t played a show since October. It’s driving me CRAZY! The good news is that I have a show on February 12th (Stompin’ Grounds Grill on Anderson Mill Rd in Austin), so that little drought will come to an end.

Speaking of droughts, I haven’t written a song in a terribly long time. The emotions of what I’ve been through the past couple of years are way too intense to try and turn into art just yet, but I’m hoping with a little perspective and distance that it will give me some good material.

One thing that is interesting to me is the concept of being a gigging performer that isn’t married. I’ve never experienced that. I’m wondering what sort of extracurricular fun that will bring. I’m not one of those musicians who started playing to impress girls – in fact, I’ve never understood that, because I’ve always done music for music – but there’s a distinct possibility that girls, or better yet, women, will be impressed with my musical performance. I already look more the part of “the guy in the band” now that I’ve grown out my hair (It’s almost as long as it’s ever been, actually), so that might bring some fodder for future blog posts, too.

I’m going to be a better, more consistent blogger this year, and really turn this into a place for good commentary and perspective on music from a part-time professional musician.

Thanks for everything, and peace be the journey!
TMS

A couple of gigs on the horizon…and a new “Bathroom Schizo” song on the way

A couple of gigs on the horizon…and a new “Bathroom Schizo” song on the way

I have two shows in Austin coming up – one with a new, sort of ragtag power trio with the guitarist from Capital Suspects that has our maiden voyage on June 19th at Stompin’ Grounds up north, and the other filling in with Capital Suspects at Baby A’s Stonelake on Saturday June 22nd. I’m excited to get out and play.

Also, I’ll be singing a song suggested by a good friend of mine as my next solo acoustic video. Not exactly sure if it’ll be shot in the friendly confines of the Spongebob bathroom, but it should be pretty good. It’s actually a good song for my voice, and I’ve always loved the message in it. That should be done within the next few days…

So that’s that in the Land Of The Musical Schizo. I hope everything’s looking good in your neck of the woods…
TMS

Footnote: I never posted this because I wasn’t around, but here is the link to the video for the aforementioned song:

TRIUMPH!

TRIUMPH!

And I’m not talking about the band, no matter how awesome they are. Saturday night’s gig with Roman Holiday was a triumph. It was a fun show, everything worked (well, once we swapped out the power amp on the mains), we all played well, and the trainwrecks were minimal, which is amazing considering we literally played together ONCE since our October gig. Playing with Ned and Lee is like breathing. I love those guys. I sang well (for the most part – Don’t Stop Believin’ and Sweet Child O’ Mine were a little “raga” at times), I played bass REALLY well, and we were a machine. Plus we had awesome people come out and see us, and amazingly, one of the people had been friends at different times in different cities with two of the others and somehow managed to see each of them for the first time in decades. It was a freaky reunion! But I’m so happy that it happened on such a great night.

I’ve placed an ad on Craigslist to try and finally get an original band off the ground. I decided I want to go for something like Fountains Of Wayne – power pop with a sort of modern edge. I’ve had three good responses. One guy has stepped back after hearing my music and saying we’re not a fit, which is fine. Still waiting to hear back from the other two. If for whatever reason I don’t manage to meet anyone to get the band going, I’ll figure out a different strategy and maybe book a few shows and hire some mercenaries.

I still need to get my solo acoustic thing off the ground…just have to finalize a song list, record some new demos more indicative of my current skill level, and start hounding venues for shows. It will happen this time, though. I need to establish as many revenue streams as possible because I need to make more money, and I don’t imagine seeing any sort of bump in salary for my day job. I might actually start trying to teach guitar or bass because that’s another way to make money with music. So if you have anyone who wants to learn the basics of guitar or bass, or even basic music theory as it relates to composition, send them my way.

Thanks to my Roman Holiday bandmates and our friends for helping make Saturday a triumphant return. If you’d like to see more from us, come see us in South Austin (FOR THE FIRST TIME PUBLICLY) at Third Base on March 15th. Hopefully there’s more to come in that department, and with MY music, and as a solo artist. We shall see.

It’s all happening!
TMS

Filling in this week!

Filling in this week!

First tonight (Monday 28th) filling in with Heavy Blue at a private party. We’ll see what happens with that. Then, this Saturday at Bar Louie on 6th Street, super excited to fill in with Capital Suspects (the band I recently quit for personal reasons). Looking forward to both.

Roman Holiday has a gig on February 16th at Hardtails in Georgetown. I’m very excited about that one, too, although I have to admit, right now I’m looking forward to rehearsals for that one more because I miss my bandmates.

No news on the artistic front – no new songs or anything (though I feel like some are coming – that’s a good feeling). I’m just happy to get out and play some shows. Come rock out with me!

TMS

2013: The Year Of Promise

2013: The Year Of Promise

SO…hello, faithful denizens of Schizoland. I appreciate the time you give to this blog. I know I don’t demand much of you because I almost never write here. I think this year will be the year that changes that. Recording my feelings about my life as a musician on a regular basis will give me some stability and perhaps even a little discipline.
A few major happenings in my life as a musician…I haven’t been gigging at all since I left Capital Suspects. Roman Holiday had literally one show after August, which really rocked. The good part about all this is that there has been a lot of turmoil in other aspects of my life, so having nothing going on in music land was very timely.

So on to 2013…”The Year Of Promise”

Roman Holiday WILL be coming back in 2013 so long as Mr. Ned still wants to do it (I already know Mr. Lee is most certainly in). In addition to that, there exists potential for a few DEADLY power trios involving your humble servant (me) coming to rip your local venue apart. Most likely at least one will involve some really great rocking music. I’m also finally going to get my acoustic act going after 10 years of talking about it. I’m dubbing it “The Musical Schizo” and will hopefully be securing some sort of regular gigs at venues near my home (so my friends down here in South Austin can come see me). It may or may not be just me or me with someone else…but I guarantee it will be both diverse, familiar, and very fun.

I make no promises about original music this year outside of stuff with the power trios, because I’m converting the home studio into a bedroom for my boy. Hopefully by summer I’ll be able to have something to replace it squared away (perhaps an air-conditioned space in the garage).

So please root for me this year. I need all the help I can get to make “The Year Of Promise” be more than just promise. And thanks for reading, and Happy New Year!

TMS

So a Capital Suspect I am no more…

So a Capital Suspect I am no more…

I joined the band a few months ago, had some fun, but realized that life outside of music was growing too complicated to really have the energy for doing the job I expect myself to do, so I resigned over the weekend. Thanks to Greg, mAndy and Paul for the good times…and best of luck to all of them.

When I get more time to give a shit about music, I’m sure I’ll consider other options…but here’s to the next thing. And until next time…

TMS

A 4th Of July post

A 4th Of July post

Just because it’s 1:42 PM and I’m home on a Wednesday, I figured it’d be cool to make a little blog post about my musical pursuits. First, a happy 4th of July to my American readers. I hope you have the day off, too. Happy birthday to my musical brother Caleb Rose (aka Salib Ali Baba from Jive Town Jimmy and the Knights of the Purple Cadillac). Now to musical stuff.

I was going through my book I keep of lyrics for songs that I perform acoustically (as rare as that particular event happens to be), and I happened upon some songs I thought I still knew. Sadly, there were chunks missing. I’ve always had a very good musical memory, so I started to play through the tunes and eventually figured out most of what was missing (I think), but the fact that it was even absent made me wonder if I’m starting to lose that skill, that steel trap of a brain that remembers how things go even if I haven’t even thought about the song in years. Probably not, but as I age, I don’t feel as fleet on the fingerboard as I once did. I sweat profusely from pretty much the first lifting of equipment before a show all the way through the end of the show, no matter what the temperature or how I’m dressed. Even though I haven’t been cursed with the graying or the loss of any hair, I think I’m finally getting a little old. Of course, that’s okay. It’s just a weird thing for someone who likes to play pop music, which is so focused on youth and vitality, to start to feel old.

Of course, then I think about the guys I see in “grandpa bands” having fun while being stunningly boring, and I realize it’s what you make of it. Who cares if you’re feeling old? Just rock out the way you know how and to the limit of your ability, and you’re still serving your audience and yourself, and being honest. I still endeavor to put on a high-energy show with Roman Holiday, and being the youngest dude in the band (and the most mobile), it’s my job to do my part to keep it moving. Thankfully I have two great foils in Ned and Lee, who both love cranking up the energy level.

As for writing and recording music, if I can get everything cleaned up and rearranged in the studio to foster creativity, then I think I’ll be able to make some progress. I recently acquired an electronic drum kit that sounds great and has USB so I can record parts into the computer more easily (and fix them because I’m a shitty drummer). Once everything is moved around a bit and streamlined, it’ll be a place where I can finally bring all the old songs to life the way I hear them in my head and hopefully write some better, newer songs that represent who I am now. As I finish projects, I’ll start releasing them on iTunes, Rhapsody, and stuff like that. But I have to finish stuff for that to happen. We will get there. 🙂

Thanks for reading, and have a great 4th of July!
TMS

So what do you want to do?

So what do you want to do?

This is a question that’s been plaguing me for quite some time now. I’ve been relatively content just kind of dragging along playing covers for the past twelve years, never really succeeding in making time for my own music. I’m not sure if it’s a defense mechanism of some sort (you can’t fail if you don’t try) or if it’s just the fact that I’m not very organized and I’m a husband and a father of two children. At times I’ve kicked around various original ideas, and I’ve written about 20 songs in the past decade, but when you compare that to my output before 2002 (and before children), it’s been literally decimated. Again, I’m not sure if this is a result of poor planning or fear of creation. It’s probably a mixture of both. Navigating a metaphorical path back to being creative is something I’d like to achieve sometime in the near future, but I’m not really sure what type of creativity I really wish to pursue. Do I want to write more songs? Do I want to take the songs I’ve written and complete my first album? (Obviously I could do both.) Is the reason I’ve had so much trouble with writing a result of crippling self-editing or a genuine lack of inspiration? Is the creativity I want to reach once more even musical? Do I want to pursue my love for comedy as a stand-up? Or is there something else out there that will allow me to express myself artistically?

It all boils down to this question, which I keep asking myself: “So what do you want to do?” Right now, I really have no idea. Roman Holiday is about to get busy, with a pile of dates booked. Four shows at Carlos & Charlie’s this summer, Two booked up in Temple at The Green Door, and a bunch of private parties. I know we want to take the band’s live show to the next level (it’s good now, but it could be better), so I know that’s going to be sapping some of my creative energy as we work our way towards that goal. For sure it will take my TIME because there are a lot of cool party-type things we’ve been meaning to add to the show, and that will be the plan over the next month and a half or so.

I’m going to do my best to capture whatever ideas and inspiration I have and write it down or record it so I don’t lose it. Even if it doesn’t end up being something useful or usable, the very discipline of capturing these ideas might lead me on the path back to being a creative person again. Thanks for reading!

TMS